1) New poem posted every Monday. 2) Send your illustrations of the poem to lifemagicmischief@gmail.com. 3) I put up some of your illustrations with the poem!
If it weren’t normal She’d be there, Dressed up all formal, Flowers in hair, But not no rose Nor lilies fine, No, she grows A crystal vine That winds and winds And winds and winds Around the world Then through her mind And out her curls It brightly shines, Lighting her way By subtle signs From hidden strays To rarest finds.
If it were weird He’d do a jig With curly beard Of moss and twigs, And sometimes mice And sometimes bats Would roost all nice Up in his hat, And always moose And always deer Would whisper clues Into his ear Of queerest things He might discover, Of course, this brings Him word of her.
They were both odd And lovely so. They were both awed By strange unknowns. Both heard there were another Like them in many ways. A strangeness lover! So they spent some days Searching but were ever late And never crossed their paths By some trick of fate Or maybe fortune’s wrath. Each were happy knowing The oddness of defeat. If one thing kept them going It’s that there were more to meet.
Huck gave his head to the watermelons In a trade for one of theirs. Now his thoughts are full of seeds While the fruit patch puts on airs. Now he’s ripe with possibility And free of heady cares. How much finer to be full of sweetness Even though he’s chased by bears. How his rind shines brighter than his mind Could ever think to dare. Huck slept in a bit too late today And rooted in bed there. If you don’t like watermelons I know a pumpkin patch or pears Who’d trade you for that fruitless head. Want to replant your upstairs?
Six of herselves ran away To see some other distant day But her seventh self chose to stay And made the difference to be made. Herselves ran off without saying, “So long!” But she was happy as they ran along, They were forgiven before they were gone.
One was bullish, another ghoulish, Many mulish and fully foolish, Though this much was tried and truish – They were afraid and let that rule us. Them, I mean! I’d never write about me! I have too many selves, you see, So let’s get back as herselves flee.
None of herselves were worst or best, Simply different than the rest, This time this one passed the test, Next another would meet the quest. Six of herselves ran away, But her seventh was brave In the way needed that day.
Crown, sword, lily, lamp, All have heroes in their camp, All held horrors at the door or Turned them ’round on their own furor To help the hunted rise as champ.
Dymphna carried these four all To help the helpless in her halls Till they could stand on their own, Still their minds and steel their bones And climb back up from any fall.
This is a genus of newts only seen during the crescent moon. Do they only exist OR can they only be observed during the slenderest phase of our moon? The debate remains unresolved. Where are these newts the rest of the time?
Cinder Newt At one time it was believed that there were certain newts or salamanders that lived in and were even birthed from fire. This was, of course, absurd. These are amphibious creatures, meaning water and land, not fire. This belief likely came from logs that were once home to newts/salamanders being thrown into a fire and the small, terrorized amphibian running out of the inferno, giving the appearance that it was there all along. The cinder newt (also called the infernewt) has organized against those careless enough to not check logs before throwing them into flame. If you toss one of them into the fire they’re coming for you and coming for you hot. They’ll burn your house down if you try to do them dirty. If you’re going to start something, finish it. Or get some good fire extinguishers. When’s the last time you checked your fire extinguisher? Make sure it’s ready to go.
Rattlenewt Instead of having just the tip of the tail as a rattle such as rattlesnakes have, the whole newt rattles! It’s a musical instrument that just wants to be left alone. Of course it bites! It doesn’t have teeth, nor venom, but it will bite you with all it’s got! Which isn’t much, but we still ask that you kindly leave it be.
Starmouth Newt Their mouth is a gateway to the stars. You can see all our solar system in there, planets, stars, twirling comets. Of course, that means we’re in there too. It’s very cozy. I’m starting to feel cramped, to be honest. Give me a little space, won’t you?
Knock Nibbed Newt External gills to better breathe in the water. External heart to better feel out the world. Internal eyes to better keep an eye on themselves. They exude a toxin that causes an existential crisis. Do not touch! I thought I was ready to question everything. I was not. No, I was not…
Newt of Nose These are minuscule newts living in the unforgiving environment of one’s nose. Each colony in every individual is its own distinct subspecies and named for the person with whom they coexist. They are all unique because they are influenced by your peculiar brain pattern. Very peculiar brain pattern… You should really join our ongoing study. We’ll be in contact soon.
High Witch’s Newt There’s something that needs clarification. Certain witchy brews famously require “eye of newt” as an ingredient. It’s not “‘eye’ of newt,” it’s “‘I’ of newt.” We are all animals and it’s the part of newt within oneself. One’s “newtiness.” The brewer must pull this from themselves. People marvel at magical knowledge and sometimes it’s as simple as being able to parse language. Effective communication is bafflingly difficult at times. Misunderstandings derail us so easily.
Welkin’s Bell Newt Certain newts produce a toxin that exudes from their skin and can be harmful to any who touch it. The welkin’s bell newt is one of those that does so. However, if you steep this newt (that is to say, give it a nice, warm bath) in water for 3-5 minutes the subsequent tea will reveal certain truths to you that you could not have arrived at on your own. Do not soak for longer than five minutes! There is a point at which you’ll see entirely too much truth and turn into a newt yourself. Us humans can only handle so much truth. Too much of it and we must become a different creature.
Walleyed Newt While grouped with other newts of the crescent moon this newt is only found on the new moon, when there is no moon in the sky. Their eyes are completely white. Cratered. It’s almost as if they hold the moon in their eyes when it’s not in the sky. But that can’t be a thing. It can’t be.
The oldest are told They are old And are so If they hear out the scold Who would hold them below The waters of soul That pull at the hole Of age in the eye of the dullest of gold.
Life, Magic, Mischief _______ with Kyle Mosher 